In the midst of A Div now! Won today's match against SA so we got into the second round!!! Was so fucking happy when we won that I almost cried. Was trembling throughout the whole match, and according to my teammates my skin was cold and clammy. I couldn't even hold the water bottle properly 'cos I was trembling so much. Had no idea why I was so afraid. Perhaps of the unfamiliarity of playing open spiker after a long time I guess? :( Hope my fear goes away in time. Can't afford to be scared right now.
Today was an emotional day for me. I got home and thought about all the past relationships and friendships that I lost. I hate losing people. People I once poured my heart and soul to, gave everything I got to. A part of your life, a part of you, gone. Just in the blink of an eye. Elaine once told me that if you really treasure the person and make the effort to keep him close to you, then you wouldn't lose him. But I beg to differ. It's really a two-way thing. If that person doesn't want you to be in his life, trying isn't going be of any use, honestly. That's when it sucks the most.
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